8.03.2010

Deep Breath....It's Gonna be Ok

Let me take a deep breath....I know this is going to sound ridiculous.

When we found out about Derrick's special heart and that he would be in the hospital for several weeks after birth, it took me a little while to find a bright side to our situation.  I like the bright side, and finding one in this wasn't very easy.  Eventually, after I had accepted the issues he would face, I was able to find two positive reasons that made me ok with Justin and I not being his sole caretakers right away...not having to deal with the care of his umbilical cord and circumcision. 

I know, I get the 'Mom of the Year Award' for even thinking about that, much less writing it here for the world to see.  I told you you would think I was ridiculous.   But really, I thought, "Well, at least we don't have to deal with those things!! Yeah!"  I mean, it's only fair.  We were first time parents who had to take care of a baby all by ourselves that you could only hold a certain way because of his chest, didn't like to eat and threw up when he did eat, PLUS had to take care of an incision from heart surgery (and protect it from the throw up).  I didn't think it was too much to ask that the other would be taken care of before we came home. 

Wrong! 

Sure wish someone would have told me that they wouldn't circumcise a baby that was waiting for heart surgery!  ;)  Not that it was a big deal, but I just assumed it would be done.  Nope.  It couldn't be done until D was fully recovered from his second surgery, and by then it would no be longer a little procedure that the pediatrician could do, but would have to be done by a pediatric urologist in the hospital.  Humph! 

 Both of my 'bright side' ideas were darkened...if we wanted him circumcised we would be dealing with all of it when he was older AND his belly button wasn't all better by the time he came home.  {I know, that's a good thing because it means he came home earlier than expected, I'm just sayin'!}

Anyway, here we are.  D's first two surgeries are behind us and he's fully healed.  We were gently reminded that if we were going to have it done that we needed to do it soon, otherwise we needed to wait until he could make the decision for himself. 

Justin and I have gone back and forth with the decision.  We always figured we would have it done because that's just what we thought was "normal." Later we decided that maybe we wouldn't do it because we didn't want to put Derrick through anything else that he didn't have to go through.  Then we talked about what we would do if we had a second son, would he have it done?  Would other kids notice that he's "different" there too?  (Because, come on, you know they look!) 

After talking to many people, including D's pediatrician, we learned that it's not quite 50/50, but close.  However, we've decided that we're going to have it done anyway.

I am nervous.

And not looking forward to the care of "the wound."

Or the unhappy little guy who probably won't feel the greatest for a couple of weeks.

Thursday morning we have to be at the hospital at 6 am.  He's supposed to have his procedure done at 7:30 and hopefully we'll be home by noon.  Beyond the care (which yes, I am mature enough to get past that, I'm just not looking forward to it) I'm nervous because D will be put under general anesthesia.  I'm sure that makes any parent nervous, but with his special heart it makes me extra nervous.  We will be at our local Children's Hospital, which is a great hospital, but D's hospital heart doctors aren't there.  We have been assured that he will be in great hands and that both the urologist and the anesthesiologist have worked on heart kids before.   D's regular cardiologist will be only a few buildings away and he and his pediatrician both ok'd it to be done.

I'm still a little nervous.

I know it's a simple procedure.  I know he's going to be fine.  I know he will have wonderful care at the Children's Hospital.  I know I'll probably still shed a few tears as I hand him over because, well, I'm just like that.  And I know he'll probably kill me one day when he reads this post. ;)  (Or when his wife reads it to him! Ha!)



Derrick, well, he's NOT thrilled about what we're doing!
Will you please keep him in your prayers?
 

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16 comments:

  1. That picture is just adoreable!!! Another heart mommy told me that Mason would not be able to be circumcised at the hospital. I'm sure we will do the same as you and have it done after Mason's surgery.

    I'm praying! Any procedure on your baby is stressful!!!

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  2. It will be okay, and I know it will be hard to leave "D" in someone's care, but he will be fine. He will be mad, but he will fine. You made the right decision, because it is a good thing to do for health reasons for little fellows. Just take a deep breath and remember you have lots of folks praying for you and yours.

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  3. I will pray.

    We got my son done when he was first born...I'm not a big fan of having to get it done later, but I think we will still get it done when we can. I'm like you, not looking forward to yet another surgery...no matter how minor!

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  4. You and Justin are the most amazing, loving, caring and concerned parents. You have such wonderful faith and the ability to think about what is best for your child, no matter what. I commend you for your thoughtfulness, your honesty and your love. We will be in prayer for D's surgery AND mom and dad as well.

    I have to agree with one thing..he is NOT going to like reading that you put his "business" out here like this LOL

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  5. Poor baby! We will be praying and thinking about you all.

    Sue Shelton & girls

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  6. Poor Baby and parents! I will be praying for a quick procedure and quick healing!

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  7. I'll definitely be praying for Derrick (and Mama & Daddy!).

    Just a little encouragement for you... Ethan had a surgery "down there" back in March, and he came home with a foley catheter and everything (not that D's will be that serious at all!), and he did just fine with it. My husband cringed every time Ethan moved a certain way, but it didn't seem to bother the little man one bit!

    Praying all goes well, and that he handles the anesthesia like a champ!

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  8. Always! and you, too!

    Learning from experience...keep lots of vaseline and gause around and he'll be just fine! (Just don't freak out the first time you see it. Luke's was horrible looking at first and now it's just fine!) :)

    Love you, friend! I know even these "simple" things are huge in our world and I am honored to carry this weight with you!

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  9. Elizabeth MarshallAugust 03, 2010 9:36 PM

    I will definitely be praying for D and his doctors. You have amazing strength and faith and God will take care of your worries.

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  10. Ok, that picture is absolutely DARLING!!!!!! Definitely praying for that sweet baby boy...[and Mommy and Daddy!]!

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  11. I know just how you feel! I felt so silly being terrified of such a "simple" procedure, but when it came time to get Elijah circumcised I could hardly take it.

    I'm sure it's way too late now, but our cardiologist recommended a ped. urologist that would do the procedure in his office with just a local. (We were really scared to have him go under general again.) It was much easier than expected and went beautifully. The after care wasn't even too bad! However, Elijah was a bit younger (around 6 months).

    I hope it goes well--let me know if you want to talk about it. ;)

    Heart hugs,
    Sarah Smith

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  12. Shannon,
    {{{HUG}}} I know, it is scary anytime our kiddos have anything done. We definitely worry about the risk. However I hope that you find some comfort in knowing that his doc is close by should anything arise. I am sure though that he will do just fine and sail right through the surgery.

    The next day...well I am sure that he will not be a happy camper but maybe lots of TLC from mommy will do the trick.

    Funny how Logan was circumcised in the hospital following his birth long before anyone knew he had heart defects. To think of how that could have went horribly wrong. Glad that the Big Man upstairs was watching out for him!

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  13. This picture is PRICELESS! We are praying for you guys and we will be waiting to hear the updates! And we are especially praying for a speedy recovery for D. Hang in there Shannon...and so what if you shed some tears...that's what makes us the great mommy's that we are. Our little boys just don't have a clue do they?
    Love In Christ...
    The Crafts

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