I'm trying my best to soak in all of these tiny baby moments this time. Finally, the third time around, I've realized just how quickly these sweet newborn days whiz by. So I've been sitting here for the past two hours in the dark listening to the breathing of my littlest Carter and his sweet daddy. I love the steadiness of Justin's breathing coupled with the unpredictableness of Ryan's, especially with the little newborn sighs and moans that he throws in there.
I'm sure in a few hours I won't be happy that the day started so early, but there's no time for regrets these days. Now that it's "blue outside" I know I'll hear the quiet shuffle of the feet of my biggest boy very soon. He doesn't typically sleep past blue. We still probably have a few hours left before Jen gets up. She's the sleeper, especially since it's raining this morning.
These past three weeks have been gloriously exhausting. The question we hear most often is "How is it going from two to three?" Ha. Well, it depends on when you ask. :).
On the days Justin is off and I've had a full four hour stretch of sleep, and the big kids wake up rested and in decent moods, it's really not a whole lot different. You just have an extra little mouth to feed, some diapers to change, and three tiny people to snuggle now. Just ore love so it's great!
Then there are those days when I'm pretty sure I never even actually went to sleep the night before. When I wake up and I could swear someone replaced my eyelids with sandpaper, when there was a baby screaming until 2am who wanted to eat again at 3 am and yet again at 5 am. And then those sweet little foot shuffles are heard at 7am by not one but two big kids who are up way too early since they were up way too late the night before. They're already saying someone hit the other one and are crying and asking for candy for breakfast and I can't even form a complete sentence much less get up and fix a decent breakfast for the hungry candy-craving kids. I'm not even sure I know what breakfast is on these mornings. And heaven forbid it be a Wednesday, when we actually have to be at school, decently dressed and fed and there on time...and Justin has to work....y'all, those days the only complete thought my brain can actually form is, "What in the world were we thinking!?"
But thankfully, God knows this mama can only handle a few of those days in a row and He sprinkles in those four hour stretches of sleep and good moods all around on occasion. And He helps me remember that this is just a season, one that I've learned goes by too quickly. And He helps me remember to enjoy the soft sounds of breathing because breathing means there's life. And He helps me to soak in the view in the room on the other side of ours, where my two big babies are snoozing together under a massive pile of pillows and blankets, because that means there's love.
My heart is full.
My mind is usually sleepy, but my heart is bursting with love.
So mostly, going from two to three is pretty darn awesome.